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2.14.2009

Is Valentine day, a Valid-fine day??

I like to watch Romantic films. The hero portrays something which I cannot do in my life (Lance will say never). Rather than watching adrenaline pumping action films, I prefer for soft, melodious romance films that sweep us all our feet. Recently I watched a film in which the hero says to his love to who he had never conversed, Hi Malini! I’m Krishnan. I’ve to tell this… You are so beautiful… No one has… seen… err… (Laughs) never a beauty like you. And I think I’m in love with you.” And in a song, the love starts between them. Is it possible to woo a lady to whom you have never talked just by this approach? Most of the films portray APPEARANCE BASED LOVE. That is the hero falls for the girl at First sight. Are such loves stronger? If you love a girl for her appearance it’s Lust. Moving on to other clippings, the hero falls for a girl as she is helpful to public, makes a blind to cross the road, helps a puppy dog that was lying in the street (really torturing that innocent dog) saves her from a villain who is so dumb and idiotic that wasting most of the time in chasing her rather than rapping and by the time he removes her Saree, SPLASH! The window breaks and the hero come from nowhere; lands a punch in Villain’s face (But this same villain will rape the hero’s sister perfectly) or dances in glamorous costumes in rain showcasing her assets. If you expect love life to be as colourful and instant as it’s in the films, you will be in for a disappointment.

 

 

Ask a teen age girl or a guy how you need a life partner or a lover, they would point to some hero/heroine and cite one of their film’s role as example. So much is the influence of films in people’s life. The first time when you responded for your would-bee’s (would-bee means lover whom you believe will marry you… Spppp!! Pity! Pity!) Affection, say girls, she would have expected him to jump up with a huge grin on his face, whoop with excitement and lift her off feet. But with a quiet smile, the guy says, “HOW ABOUT A COFFEE?” After all this was not how the hero reacted in a movie. Teens expect too much from a romantic movie, that at least a scene should be a part of their love life. Watching romantic films could be ruining your relationships as it maybe promoting unrealistic expectations of love. Those who were inspired by YOU HAVE GOT MAIL would have failed to communicate with their partners. Instead, they believed that if someone was meant to be with you, they should know what you wanted without being told. Whenever these movie-like expectations come up they do so reflexively. Girls would have expected guys to do things for her based on that, but later they’ll feel silly. One of my school friends, an ardent fan of SRK, after watching Kuch Kuch Hota Hai expected her partner to be like SRK in the movie, “a partner who was with children When she said to her mom, she gave red-hot treatment at her butts.

 

Expecting your partner to know what you want without conveying it to him will not work in real life. It’s stupid to expect that. Many couples believe that things will be perfect from day one. They do go to psychiatrists, counsellors complaining they are feeling disappointed in their partners because these things don’t happen. Instead, you can take positive tips from these movies and do something for your partner instead of expecting something to be done for you. If you think about it practically, all the things that are portrayed on screen will not work in real life. Everything is exaggerated. For example, the things that Shah Rukh Khan does in a film are not at all possible in real life. But still, girls go gaga for him. There are others who could differentiate between film and life. The amount a film influences a person depends upon the maturity of the individual, how they interpret what they see. If the relationship is good, you may be able to get together and laugh at how they portray love in the films. Else sit and complain, shout at him/her over phone that “You were not like this hero/heroine”

 

In a good relationship, especially one over many years you do understand your partner without him/her having to say much. But it takes a lot of time, effort and communication and even misunderstanding. This is what I call Love but I may get NEGATIVE (stress it again) comments like I’m SRS, RSS follower. Never follow any films or advice from blogs, news articles, books like How to woo a lady, how to get a girl for a date. Love should come from you naturally not being instilled into you through other mediums. Those who advice how to love, how to woo a lady are worse than RSS and so common guys, Why to watch and read those that preach you how to love a lady? Give a call to the cupid that is inside you. Your cupid and your love and don’t look for other cupids to piss you at your face and say WAKE UP MAN! DO LIKE THIS! You are your master.

 

I am against Valentine’s Day as Lance said being a single I’m against it. I think we should celebrate love and friendship every day! Then why a special day for it? Guys who never give cards and gifts to their Mom and dad, sit at the gift shop for hours, flipping through the cards? One of my friends was in love with his childhood mate for around 4 years. Though he was scared a bit to propose her, taking an idea from one idiot who told him FEBRUARY 14, A PERFECT DAY TO PROPOSE. SHE WON’T REJECT YOU and he never disclosed her for 5 months waiting for February 14 and when the lucky day came, he proposed her, she said OOPS! I WAS INTO A RELATION NOW! 2 MONTHS BACK! I LIKE YOU BUT YOU WERE LATE! So dumber, don’t wait for February 14 thinking it is a Lucky day to tell your partners how much you care for them. I might spend this day as a SAD for Lance; I say Yes and SAD means Single Awareness Day.

 

How happy is life without a Lover (GF/BF)

Reasons why life without a lover (GF/BF) is cool

1. You can stare at any girl / boy... (No one can give me a tough competition in this)

2. You don't have to spend money on him/her. (Big +)

3. You won't get boring result in your board papers.
 

4. No lover, no emotional blackmailing.

5. This can be more to life than just waiting for the bloody phone to ring.

6. You won't have to tolerate someone else defining, "right" and "wrong" for u.

7. BF/GF can get so possessive that you can't do anything according your wishes anymore.

8. You can buy gifts for mom, dad, sis or grandpa instead of a BF/GF and have a happier family life.

9. You won't have to waste paper writing love letters. No more endless waiting for your date to arrive at some weird shop place.

 

But there are some worrying factors when the couples go overboard in the name of love. Valentine’s Day is losing its morale. 

Recently I witnessed one who went on to kiss in public at the bus depot forgetting the fact they were being watched by hundreds. I would be happy if they proceeded further and had a LIVE SEX in the street. Oops! What a miss and a mess to the culture? If you go to theatres, never sit behind a couple of corner seats. You will be thrown into a dilemma when to watch the film running in the screen or the Porn film running in front of you. Few might say it is inconceivable how an expression of love by a young couple would attract offence of obscenity. But why to throw it to public? Can we have beds installed all over parks, beaches for you so that you can grow your love? Utter Nonsense. Oral sex is shown in all the beaches and parks, which blemish the true value of LOVE.

 

Sri Ram Sena goes to the extreme of thrashing the lovers at public. They are ready to tie knots for the Valentines today if seen. Mmmphh… If at all they existed two years before I would have stood aside my girl at public for hours. Jokes apart, if we allow this Talibans to exist, they would go to the extreme of saying GIRLS SHOULDN’T SELL VEGETABLES AND FLOWERS TO GUYS, NURSES SHOULDN’T TAKE CARE OF MALE PATIENTS, GIRLS SHOULDN'T TALK TO CONDUCTORS TO GET TICKETS IN BUS They call themselves saviors of culture but they try to take the world back to pre-historic times. So girls, if they come for getting vote, you know what to do? YOU ARE MALE… SO WE ARE AGAINST YOU… YOU TOLD GIRLS SHOULDN’T TALK WITH GUYS and shut the door, apply the principles to them... Taking laws at your hands and beating the individuals in public is sickening and doing it so in the name of brotherhood is more embarrassing, so anyone who believes that women should be free human beings should join in condemnation of backward, oppressive behaviour wherever it is found.

 

To all True Lovers, who love with the idea of not ditching their partners, not flaunting their love in Public, I wish you a HAPPY VALENTINE’s DAY. For others who think it is a day to show off your lust, better book a room at hotel or a resort and have a great night. Love is the answer, but while you're writing for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.

 


This Valentine’s Day send ROSES to SRS, RSS to show VIOLENCE won’t bring a change.

 

PS: So Lance, through our perspective differs, I’m expecting Harsh Negative (Stress it again) critics from you: P these are my ideologies on Valentine’s Day and you know being in Chennai for few years. Remember Merina and Parks and say how they’ve re-defined love. This is what made me a Valentine day hater. You could tell they are exceptional cases but now it’s growing at a rapid speed. I Respect Love and respect True Lovers.


 THANKS!!! KEEP VISITING!!!

33 Droplets:

G3 said...

first?

Karthik said...

yes first!! Congrats!!!

G3 said...

Great post.. Accept with almost all the points in ur post :)

Senorita said...

@ Kartik...Love as first sight is the most misused comcept... there is never Love at first sight... it is always lust at first sight...

Further I believe Love is not based on what you see, but it is a complex emotion that is a result of what you see, feel, hear, sense and for that matter smell :)

You feel safe, protected, cocooned etc, when you are truly loved.

Agree with you on the You Got mail kinda love... you need to communicate...

Further SRK kinda love is pure unadulterated crap :P

What the RSS & SRS are doing is also worse, they cannot dictate what a person does or how a person behaves... these are the guys who do all this hooliganism during the day and behave like the very people they target at night... two-faced bigots all of them...

Senorita said...

@ kartik...almost forgot...

agree with you that you are your own cupid... no one else can help you in these matters :P

Senorita said...

@ kartik...Lancelot awaiting your criticism... I am on Karthiks side :P

Vinnie said...

Karthik !!
beautiful thoughts n i really appreciate ur insights, man:)

i would like to vouch for this one personally : 4. No lover, no emotional blackmailing...sadly, the emotional blackmail continues even without love..hehhehehehehe

Valentines Day is everyday, I love u Karthik - today, tomorrow n forever after:)

Lance, u really think of opposing Karthik's views?? go, sit in Marina beach..its pathetic..i'm sure they r all from the Sri Ram Sena..monkeys after all:)

Kartz said...

Neat insights there... ;)

Lol at the title! ;D

And dude, forgot to ask you - Federer more than just erred in that final, didn't he!?!

Neways, ve fun. ;)

Peace.

arun said...

superb post..wat u've mentioned here is absolutely true.

ஆளவந்தான் said...

me 10th??? haahah

konjam time kudupa padichuttu varren

swathi paul(dew drop) said...

nice
prespective on love.i liked it

ஆளவந்தான் said...

Hey,

Nice thoughts, I thought of putting some "mokkai" comment here, but I couldnt . I am sorry about that.

Regarding Fantasy love, All these blame goes to Girls. I dont believe boys have fantasy love.

Unakkulla oru "thanmana singam" onnu thoongi kittu irukku pola..

Sometime these kind of thoughts will come when you are frustrated by being a SINGLE.... LOL :)))

I dont know, which causes for this post, I really enjoyed. Thanks mate.

ஆளவந்தான் said...

Here is my view, if you have gf/bf

1. You can stare at any girl / boy... (No one can give me a tough competition in this)
There is always someone for you to stare :)

2. You don't have to spend money on him/her. (Big +)
spend money, but save your memories, multiply your happiness

3. You won't get boring result in your board papers.
Nooooo COMMENTS LOL:)

4. No lover, no emotional blackmailing.
This will not come if the love is/was true

5. This can be more to life than just waiting for the bloody phone to ring.
What the hell is that? :) I hope after attending the call, you would do anything in FRACTION of seconds

6. You won't have to tolerate someone else defining, "right" and "wrong" for u.
There is always someone to guide/shape you

7. BF/GF can get so possessive that you can't do anything according your wishes anymore.
I agree, you cant do anything according your wishes anymore.LOL But you could do anything according HER/HIS wishes anytime

8. You can buy gifts for mom, dad, sis or grandpa instead of a BF/GF and have a happier family life.
Instead you can bring HER/HIM as a gift to them

9. You won't have to waste paper writing love letters. No more endless waiting for your date to arrive at some weird shop place.
This is out-of-date thought. No one is using paper now, Waiting?? Where are you rushing? Why can't you wait for sometime who is very special for you, going to come along with you rest of your life.
Hold on.. she/he is coming.... :))))


Enjoy maddy :))

Ajai said...

Superb Points macha!! Well said!!! Its rarest of cases now a days to find Love without lust!!! Now i support you and against Lancelot!!!

Ramyah said...

Karthik..i think you should have got a doctorate in Love (without being in love)hmm.But what you have mentioned in your post regarding love at first sight is 100% true. There isn't a thing called love at first sight..it's just physical attraction.I hope your views still remain the same even after getting a girlfriend.

Thoorika said...

idhu lendhu enna theridhu?!!! Nee NARIYA padam paakuren nu theridhu..!!! :D SO finally with whom did you go out for a date?! Nee dha periya list sonniye.. !![A mix of good and bad looking girls!! :P]

GAYATHRI said...

anna!accordin to me valentines day is nothin spl..if its a true love then every single day ll be a valentines day for them..wat if its 14 feb or 14 march...:)

Lancelot said...

@ Kartik and All

In my blog I gave tips for guys who want to get a girl...I never supported any thing like Love at first sight and stuffs like that, what tips I gave in my blog is to get a date and not a love...thats what the PS: A LOT CAN HAPPEN OVER A COFFEE, but dragging it further depends on you, means... and I never believed in Valentine's day- thats for people who doesn't love the girl/guy in the rest of 364 days (and 365 days in case of Leap Year)...

and Kartik alone (others don't read this ok)

Do you remember the Dr Hitch talk I gave u about attitude?? didn't I tell you how love should happen??and do you think I will oppose this post or criticise it when you have voiced line by line what I think about the INDIAN concept of love as shown in movies and happening in reality in MARINA (its not spelt MERINA) and Parks...

Karthik said...

karthik, when you became 'karuthu kandhasamy'?

no, its really great. :)

Karthick Krishna CS said...

@karthik
this one is more of like a "what is true love" than "Is Valentine day, a Valid-fine day??".... i dont celebrate all these greeting card days.. i celebrate everyday... pretty long post than i expected...

Tara said...

Yes...looking at love in films does hamper reality. You start believing that real life is like what is shown in movies. Well written post. :)

viji said...

Reasons why life without a lover (GF/BF) is cool


i agree with all ur points. same blood. gf/bf nightmares.

i hate to be loved. =(

hahaahakkkzzz

swati said...

hey u covered almost all the aspects..u shud have left something fr us to comment yaar..
well things look beautiful when they come naturally..so let ur love flow.bt don't force urself to love ur partner..
n i too hate PDA's

sri ram sena acting as moral custodians..lol, joke of the decade.
good going yaar..
take care!!

விஜய் said...

Dude,
We all will have Matching day.

If you don't know the meaning of Matching day, see the movie, "Youth" :-)

A good relationship between a boy and a girl is possible only when there are no high expectations and good communication.
And more than that it involves lot of sacrifice. You have to give up a lot to take back even a small thing.

All the best :-)

/Vijay

swati said...

waiting for your comment on my post buddy..
i hope u like it dear..its not actually humuros as you said n wished..
but its somewhat on a lighter note..

kanagu said...

great post Karthik.. very nice.. I am very late here.. sorry

V. Archana said...

hey..this is a gr8 one :)

Karthik said...

@G3: Thns Sis!! Keep Dropping!!!

@Seno: Big rply.. Thnks Sen!!!

@Vin

//Valentines Day is everyday, I love u Karthik - today, tomorrow n forever after:)//

Thnk You Vin.. I too Love you.. Sorry for conveying late :P


@Kartz: Thnks Buddy!!! Keep dropping!! Fedex s ma nest post if i'm free!!

@arun: Thanks!!

@Swathi: keep dropping mate!!!

Karthik said...

@aalavandaan: Avvvv!! LOL!! Good dude!!!


@Ajay: Thanks machi... Extra tea for you!!


@Ramyah: No girl friend Ramya.. Arranged marriage!! :)

@Thoorika: Me ah?? I invited all the girls saying 2day s ma birthday and had a BLASTING DATE... Like OSO, ALL SCHOOL BOYS COME ON MAKE UP SOME NOISE AND SAY HAPPY VALENTINES.....

@Gayathri: Same sis!! No spl day needed... Thnks!!! Keep dropping!!


@Lancelot: u stamp the beach so it is MERINA... :) Common man.. Plz oppose this!!! :P V have 2 fight!!

Karthik said...

@Karthik: No I'm Mounam pesiyadhe Surya!!! :) Thnks!! Keep dropping!!


@ Kake: Reg long post, will cut short it soon!!! :) and reg title, thought of drawing a line on V'day by giving intro abt Love but it went so big... :) Keep dropping


@Tara: Yeas!! Keep visiting tara!! Will add HANGMAN soon!!


@Viji: I Like to be Loved!!! :)


@Swathi: Thnks dear!!! From next post lemme leave sme key points so that u cn add...


@Vijay: Right! Lot of sacrifices to understand ur partner but it shd b to a limit nanbha!!!


@kanagu: Doesn't matter dude.. Ur comment s a big thing fr me!! :)))) Better late than never

@Archana: First time here!! keep dropping!! Thnks!!

Lancelot said...

@ Kartik lets fight I am opposing what u said...

Lancelot said...

@ Kartik

nee mounam pesiyathey suryaava- ada goyakka neeyum avanaa mathiri muttala- entha ponnayum love panna maatara aana ivar kanna varancha ponnu, phone call panna ponnu, kannadi thiruduna ponnu, follow panna ponnu - yaarunnu face kudaa parkama love la vilunthuru vaaram...apppuram lover ava illa therincha innoru oru super figure two seater la vanthona love pannuvaram - athey figure Corporation bus la vantha parkka mokkai figureaa irunthu-- yaarada daabaikiringaa ??? :P

viji said...

### I Respect Love and respect True Lovers. ###

naanum naanum.. :D